“You are God’s great joy!” These simple words resonated deeply within me, echoing a truth I knew intellectually but struggled to grasp emotionally. As a Christian for years, immersed in ministry, I understood the concept of divine love. Sermons, prayers, and scripture affirmed it. Yet, a skeptical voice within me, like a questioning teenager, immediately retorted, “Why?”
Why would God specifically love me? Why would He find delight and joy in me? The struggle to accept this profound love unveiled a deeper journey of self-discovery. Over time, God illuminated three crucial themes that were hindering my understanding and acceptance of His love, themes that many of us grapple with when questioning, “Does anyone truly love me for me?”
The Mirror of Self-Love: Overcoming Self-Condemnation
The first revelation was deceptively simple: my struggle to perceive God’s love mirrored my difficulty in loving myself. This isn’t about superficial self-love, but a grounded self-acceptance rooted in our identity in Christ. While faith calls for humility and selflessness, it also invites us to walk in confident humility, recognizing our inherent worth as children of God and heirs with Christ. Instead of embracing this truth, I often saw myself as perpetually inadequate, a worker striving for approval, constantly falling short of both my own and perceived divine standards.
During this period, unexplained physical pain surfaced. Medical examinations offered no answers. In prayer, seeking understanding, the phrase “self-condemnation” repeatedly emerged. Initially, its meaning was unclear. Through exploration and reflection, God revealed the myriad ways I was self-critical. This self-condemnation manifested as a false belief: that God condemned me for my human fallibility and mistakes. Intellectually, I knew salvation didn’t erase my humanity or the potential for sin. However, the Gospel message, as Romans 5:8 powerfully states, “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us,” offered a powerful antidote.
Preaching the Gospel to myself became a daily practice, a conscious choice to counter self-condemnation with truth. It meant returning to the core of Jesus’ sacrifice. His perfect life wasn’t a standard for me to strive for in my own strength, but a gift that covered my imperfections. His death and resurrection paved the way for me to be seen through His perfection, not my flawed efforts. Trying to earn love through perfection was a trap – a works-based religion that stood in stark contrast to the grace-filled freedom offered by the Gospel. This realization began to shift my perspective on self-worth and God’s unconditional love.
Truth Over Feelings: Realigning Emotions with God’s Word
The second pivotal lesson was recognizing the undue weight I placed on my feelings over objective truth. Emotions are a beautiful, God-given aspect of our humanity. However, feelings are also subjective and susceptible to deception. The enemy, as scripture suggests, exploits our emotions because of their potent influence. Feelings color our perception of everything, including ourselves and our relationships. Misperceptions, fueled by emotions, can distort how we interact with others and, crucially, how we view ourselves. Recognizing this, I began the intentional work of realigning my feelings with the unwavering truth of God’s Word.
This understanding ignited a renewed passion for immersing myself in scripture – reading, memorizing, and declaring God’s Word over my life. Verses that once seemed familiar now vibrated with new life, becoming anchors of truth amidst emotional storms. Passages like Zephaniah 3:17, Romans 8:37-39, and Isaiah 54:10, previously recited, now became deeply personal declarations:
“The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.” Zephaniah 3:17 ESV
“No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:37-39
“Though the mountains be shaken, and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you.” Isaiah 54:10
These verses, and many others, became my firm foundation, reminding me that God’s love is constant, regardless of fluctuating feelings. This principle extends beyond divine love; in human relationships, particularly when questioning “Does He Love Me For Me?”, it’s crucial to look beyond fleeting emotions and seek evidence in consistent actions and words aligned with truth and commitment.
The Right Mirror: Seeing Ourselves Through God’s Eyes
The third transformative insight arrived unexpectedly. God used a young girl in my life as a mirror, reflecting my own distorted view of His love. This young girl, struggling with insecurity, doubted her own beauty and lovability. She found it difficult to believe in others’ love, which consequently hindered her ability to comprehend God’s love for her.
As I spoke words of affirmation and truth over this young girl, something profound happened within me. It was as if God allowed me to see my own younger, insecure self reflected in her struggle. Speaking truth to her felt like speaking truth to myself. This experience brought 2 Corinthians 3:18 to life:
“But we all, with unveiled faces, looking as in a mirror at the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18
This verse speaks to a powerful principle: when we truly see God for who He is, when we gaze upon the glory of Christ, a transformative process begins. We are changed, gradually, into His likeness. Similarly, when we seek to understand if someone truly loves us for who we are, it requires looking beyond our own insecurities and distorted self-perceptions and seeing ourselves through the eyes of love and acceptance – whether that be divine love or genuine human affection.
While growth is a continuous journey, today, when asked if God delights in me, the answer is an emphatic “Yes!” Through the practice of preaching the Gospel to myself, immersing myself in God’s truth, and extending love and truth to others, a profound transformation has occurred in my understanding of love and self-worth.
When wrestling with the question, “Why would God love me?” or “Does he really love me for me?”, the answer lies not in our flawed self-perception, but in the unwavering, unconditional love that sees us as we truly are and loves us nonetheless. It’s in seeing ourselves through the mirror of God’s love, and allowing that reflection to reshape our understanding of our own inherent worth and lovability.
