Love. It’s a feeling that has inspired poets, artists, and dreamers for centuries. We all crave it, search for it, and hope to hold onto it. Reflecting on my own relationship, which has beautifully defied fleeting expectations, I find myself pondering a question as old as time: how long will I love you? It’s easy to look back in contentment when love endures, but what about those moments when it doesn’t? Is believing in lasting love simply naive, or is there something more to those initial, powerful feelings? Should we cautiously wait for time to reveal love’s true nature, or should we embrace the leap of faith it demands?
My friend Sasha, a vibrant theatre director with a passionate heart, firmly believes in love at first sight and the power of immediate connection. “In every significant relationship I’ve had,” she declared, “the ‘I love you’s’ were exchanged within the first couple of weeks. I genuinely think that’s normal, even wonderfully encouraging. You often just know.”
Sasha’s own story beautifully illustrates this conviction. She met Ezra during her undergraduate years at NYU. “He walked into the classroom, this young professor,” she recounted, her eyes sparkling with the memory. “I remember every detail – his plum-colored paisley shirt, blue jeans, an Orioles baseball cap, even his green backpack. I can picture the classroom windows and who sat beside me. As he began to speak, everything around him seemed to fade, and I was just consumed by this overwhelming feeling that I had to have him in my life. It was a completely physical sensation.” Yet, leaving class, reality struck. “This is a disaster,” she thought, overwhelmed by the intensity of this unexpected need.
Despite the initial shock, Sasha recognized it as love. And incredibly, that love persisted for the next 25 years. Life unfolded, relationships came and went, marriage and divorce occurred, but Sasha and Ezra remained connected, maintaining a tradition of annual dinners. Then, last summer, their annual dinner transformed into something more – a date. They have been living together ever since, their initial spark rekindled into a lasting flame.
“The ancient Greeks had this fascinating idea that love was a God, Cupid, represented as a blind baby,” Sasha mused, reflecting on the unpredictable nature of love. “Cupid isn’t just a baby lacking common sense – babies are known for that! – but a blind baby randomly shooting arrows. You could be struck by love at any moment, without warning.” For Sasha, this ancient myth remains the most compelling explanation for the often-unexplainable phenomenon of love.
The very phrase “falling in love” speaks volumes about its nature. Falling is effortless; gravity takes over. But the idea of falling from a great height, losing control, is inherently frightening. “It’s unsettling to consider that something so profound might be chosen for you,” Sasha continued, delving deeper into the anxieties love can evoke. “Especially in our modern, secular world, where we so strongly believe in controlling our own destinies.” Love, in its essence, often disregards our meticulously crafted five-year plans and our desire for control. Perhaps declaring “I love you” isn’t just a statement of affection, but a profound act of acceptance – surrendering to something beautifully irrational, something beyond our complete understanding.
